Every once in a while, reality gets so strange it starts to feel like a parody. That’s when satire steps in—not to escape the madness, but to make sense of it. Or at least, to laugh while the reef burns.
If you’re a regular reader, you know I’m a fan of George Orwell. This piece was inspired by his kind of storytelling—dark truths hiding in absurd metaphors. It’s the tale of a real fish with a very strange lifestyle.
I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Sometimes we need a little comic relief.
It started with a spicy dinner, two glasses of wine, and a Discovery Channel documentary. I drifted off for the night and dreamed of a fish that somehow made political sense.
The MAGAfish™
Because sometimes the truth has gills.
The Asian sheepshead wrasse, Bodianus reticulatus, never asked to be political. It swims the cold Pacific off Korea and Japan, minding its own business—changing sex, growing a knob on its head, and seducing divers with pouty lips and gill flair.
But now, thanks to Donald Trump, it may become the most patriotic fish in the sea.
Or at least, the most rebranded.
“It’s a perfect fish. Strong jaw. Beautiful young females. Very Trumpy.”
Trump loves naming things. Gulf of America. Kung Flu. Trump Steaks. Trump Shuttle. A vodka line he didn’t drink. The natural world? Just another licensing opportunity waiting to be gold-plated.
Which is why the sheepshead wrasse is now in danger of becoming… the MAGAfish™.